been telling mum lies in order to prevent her from going bonkers... and in doing so, to maintain some form of sanity for myself, and the people around me. all these are seemingly against the vows that i took when i took refuge (in buddhism).
but i have reconciled the whole thing with the idea of intentionality. not telling lies is a principle that now serves to guide me as i live my life. but if i have to do so in the better interest of people, i will not hesitate to do it. in life, things are not so clear after all. there are black and white. and there are lots of shades of grey.
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