Grieving the loss of normalcy

I read someone's sharing this morning that we are all grieving. Grieving over the loss of normalcy and having been forced to embrace a new lifestyle we are probably not totally prepared for.

I like this idea and I agree with the author of that post. I am a trained grief counselor and it didn't strike me that indeed we are all going through different stages of grief. Just look at the many LinkedIn posts sharing about difficulties in adapting, challenges, stress, etc especially 2-3 weeks ago. The sharing that we are all going through different stages of grief helped me connect the dots.

In grief counselling, we acknowledge that people grief differently. Some take a longer time to grief compared to others. It is in this context that I understand why many still show signs of anger or denial when it comes to WFH and embracing a new normal. Even until now. Thus, I appreciate the latest move by the authorities that counseling are categorized as essential services.

With time, we will come to terms and accept this new norm. Some will take days, some weeks, and some longer. This process is no different from how we grief when someone dear passed on. Agree? It is a time to empathize, to support and to be there to listen.

Be safe and be well.

Disappearing Sex Drive

Is it just me and aging, or is it an effect of the current Covid-19 pandemic? Or perhaps it's a combination of both. I do not seem to feel horny these days! 

Hmmm...

Ironing Board Work Desk

This is one creative way to create a work desk if you don't have one, or if you want something different - Use your ironing board as a work desk! I mean, its height is adjustable, and you are not gonna use it anytime soon too right?

Lol... and yes, I do have colleagues working with their laptops on the ironing board and doing stretches and work-outs at the same time. You just need to adjust the height to knee level (or lower) and you can do your stretches on your yoga mat at the same time!

And that is what I will do! Have been working with my laptop placed on my dining table for the last 2 weeks and it gets a little messy when I need to have my meals. So yeah! Let's have a change.

Stay home, stay safe, and while at it, be creative and have some fun!

Nonsense

Chloroquine, ultraviolet, bleach... 

What’s next?

Sighs.

Irresponsible.

Embarrassing.

Fourth Lunar Month

It's the start of the 4th lunar month and it's a significant day for many Muslims and Buddhists. For Buddhists, it marks the countdown to Vesak Day that will occur on the 15th day, and for Muslims, it also marks the start of the holy Ramadan. Here're my wishes;

To all my Muslim friends,

Selamat Berpuasa! Blessed fasting month to you and all your loved ones! It's a challenging time for all but do take the opportunity to spend quality time with family and to connect with your faith in the blessed sanctuary of your home. Please stay safe and well 🙏🏻

And to all my Buddhist friends,

Have a blessed countdown to Vesak Day. For those who are observing your pre-Vesak fasting and rituals, do it with right mindfulness, right thoughts, and right actions. May you achieve wisdom and calm as you observe your practices.

And to everyone else, be safe, be healthy and be happy.

WFH routines

I started working from home since 6 Apr and my initial weeks were terrible and highly stressful. And the following are what I have learned to do since to maintain a certain level of sanity in my schedule during this WFH period:

• I block my calendar to prevent people from sending me meeting invites at unreasonable times eg during lunch or in the evenings.

• I block my calendar to make sure I have time to do my work, engage my staff, as a team and one on one. Its crazy how some people assume you are always free just because your schedule has an innocent looking unblocked slot.

• I block my time to give myself the me time to rest mentally. This may be to catch up with rest, to cook my lunch, to do my personal admin, etc. Come to think of it, when I work from office, we planned for travel time to meetings, meeting breaks etc. These gives us the mental breaks we need.

WFH does not mean all my time are open for meetings ALL the time. I will of course be professional to ensure I prioritise my time correctly, do what I need to do to earn my pay, and deliver my performance as expected of me.

Agree?

Respecting others

I cooked curry two days ago. It’s part of my Peranakan heritage. And since young, I’ve donned the sarong, ate with my hands and speak Peranakan Malay. I still do many things including eating with my hands these days. Trust me, food are more fragrant and tastes much better. It is a culture I identify with and proud of.

I made these points because I read that someone commented in the papers about the “dirty” habits of our foreign workers, and attribute this dirtiness to their cultural habits such as eating with their hands. This, to me, showed a lack of understanding of other people’s culture, or worst still, a lack of respect of their culture.

Have we not realized that we owe much of our quality of life, environment and infrastructure to these foreign workers? Just look at the unkept and overgrown weeds along the roads, and open spaces, the many construction projects, etc and you will see where we will be without these silent heroes. These workers are here to earn a living for their families. Sadly, they are often housed in dormitories, hidden away from the mainstream. 

This is a time to come together, to empathize, to support and to be one. We owe them much, and the least we can do is to accept their presence and contributions, respect them and their culture, appreciate their contributions and make sure they return safely to their families when their contract ends.

We in Singapore are definitely much more than that.

Netflix

Netflix is my best friend during this period and it's been a non-stop overdose of Korean drama, sitcoms, movies, etc.

• Crash Landing onto You
• Sky Castle
• Kingdom
• Friends
• Kim's Convenience
• Ossan's Love in the Sky
• Crown
• Happy Together

The list goes on. It’s also just as fun to rewatch many shows, especially those from Ghibli. The creativity of the animation never fail to blow me away!

• Ponyo
• Spirited Away
• Howl’s Moving Castle

Super nice!

Not a time for politics

This is the time for solidarity and not for politics. It's not the time to ridicule people and definitely not the time to cut funding. Perhaps the purpose of the corona virus is to wake our ideas, see the truth and get rid of all these people.

Wtf...

Lemak

Here's a recipe of something I enjoyed as a kid. It's a Peranakan (straits-born Chinese) vegetable stew recipe that I cannot find anywhere. The closest I can describe it is that is similar to sayur lodeh (an Indonesian vegetable stew). Managed to reproduce earlier this week and thoroughly enjoyed it. Nothing beats being brought back to the good old days of mum's cooking. The smell and the taste of childhood!

Here's the recipe:

Vegetables

Ladies finger - 4-5 (cut slanted) can consider fry first to remove the sticky secretions and put aside

Long beans - 5-6 (cut into 3cm lengths)

Brinjal - 1 (sliced)

Cabbage - half a cabbage (choose Chinese Beijing cabbage as it cooks and soften better)

Tempeh (fermented soya bean slabs) - 2 pieces( sliced into 3cm width, fry first and put aside)

Taukwa (soya bean slabs) - 2 pieces (cut into 4 pieces diagonally - sprinkle with a bit of salt and fry till golden brown), then set aside

Others (depends on own taste) - 1 carrot

Rempah (Spice mix)

Dried chilli - 7-8 pieces (soaked and cut up)

Fresh red chilli - 5-6 pieces (cut up)

Buah keras (candle nut) - 3-4 nuts

Kunyit (turmeric) 1 small piece

Onions/ shallots - 8-9 pieces

Belachan (fermented dried shrimp slabs) - one small piece (toast it over fire to make it more fragrant)

Heh bee (dried prawns) - 1-2 tablespoon (soaked in water to make it soft)

Others

Fresh prawns - 8-9 prawns

Heh bee (dried prawns) 2 tablespoons (soaked in water to make it soft and then drained off)

Water (or chicken stock) - enough to fill pot - should be about 2 litres at least

Coconut milk - 1 sachet (can also squeeze from one coconut or use 1 packet ready made coconut milk)

Salt to taste (or if preferred 1 cube of Chicken stock)

Cooking Oil (can mix with a bit of sesame oil if desired, but I prefer not)

Preparation of Rempah

Put everything into grinder, add a little water and grind. You have a choice to decide how fine you want to grind it. For me, I like it fine.

Cooking

Heat oil, fry the dried prawns to draw out the taste. Should take about 15-30sec. Then put in rempah when hot and stir fry till it dries up. This is also to caramelize the shallots. Add in the hard vegetables (eg cabbage, ladies fingers and long beans) and continue frying before adding water/ chicken stock. Bring to boil, add the softer vegetables, tempeh, prawns, taukwa (basically add everything else) and let it simmer. Finally, add the coconut milk, bring to boil and prepare to serve. Add salt or soya sauce to taste.

Tip 1: if using fresh coconut, use the thin second round coconut extract first, bring to boil, add the first round thick extract, bring to boil and then serve.

Tip 2: If you want to have the flexibility to adjust the spiciness, you can consider removing a small portion (say 1/4) of the rempah after frying it. Continue with the cooking and add/ adjust accordingly to suit your liking after you have added the coconut milk.

Be well

I do hope my blog reader friends are keeping well during this challenging period.

It’s an interesting time for humanity. I happened to check in with a friend from San Francisco and he said he had been working from home since Mar 20. And he added that positively, he liked the more empty roads but have to get used to longer working hours and the long grocery queues at the supermarkets. And it hit me that all over the world, we are all experiencing the same thing. It is perhaps a once a life time thing to have this happening. And it's created by one single virus!

Hope my friends the world over are keeping safe and well!

Fake News Singapore Style 2

Yesterday PM Lee made a statement on air updating us about the latest situation of the Covid 2019 locally and the additional measures the government will be taking. The live telecast was scheduled at 4pm, which is different from the usual 8pm telecasts of all his previous public telecasts. And the amount of fake news that was circulated through the day was crazy...

These fake news came from people who claimed they have credible sources. Here's one from a guy call "Vincent" that made me superbly irritated. And to make this piece of trash look more authentic, the message carries the PM Office Facebook background and the state crest.  I cannot recall the exact words but it went something like this:

"Dear all,

PM Lee will be making a statement later at 4pm. This was brought forward to 8pm because it's very urgent.

Singapore will be locked down to control the spread of the covid 2019 virus. And to control and contain the virus, the police and the SAF will be deployed to control movement. The locked down will be by regions. There will be four regions - West, East, North and Central. This will help to ensure any virus spread will be contained within the different regions... ... ...

This news is from an insider source and is highly credible. Please watch PM Lee's speech later."

It doesn't take much to know that this is fake news and contains a huge load of bullshit. It serves nothing other generate and spread fear. Bloody irresponsible. I do seriously urge my fellow Singaporeans to avoid sending and spreading such messages. Forwarding any news, even if it is well intentioned, may end up creating unnecessary fear.

Please act responsibly. 

Fake News Singapore Style 1

My sis sent me a WhatsApp message that she received from my cousin, who in turn received it from someone else, and it went like this:

"arrrr i tell you ah, I heard from my friend sister-in-law who knows someone working in NEA. This person hor, overheard from her big bosses that they are going to lock down Singapore for next two weeks. So I tell you all ah, this info is very credible one... you all better go down to NTUC and buy everything you can and stock up now!"

My sister asked me if it is true. I asked her why she still bothers to read such trash. And worst still, ask if it is true. She said she wants to verify the truth and wants to share notes.

I gave my sis a good verbal trashing...