you need your you time

here's a constant liner in the many conversations i have had with people i know, latest being with my chief a few days ago.

you need to be fair to yourself and give yourself some you time. you cannot look after your mum if you don't give yourself you time. you cannot sustain. 

i don't disagree. 

but i also don't agree totally cos they do not know how i find my balance. 

in the first place, most people assume that i do not have my me time. that is not true. i get my me time through the few minutes of "rest" daily when i head out for a quick walk after she goes to bed.  i get my me time when i walk to work, when i have my breakfast, etc. importantly, i try as much as i can to live my life mindfully. and that, is my me time. secondly, when i tell people i do not go out with friends cos when i do so, she will become suspicious, most people assume that when i spend my time with her, i end up getting totally stressed out cos it is often against my wishes. that is also not necessarily valid. let me discussed in the context of intentionality. while i do admit that at times, i feel stressed by her freaking out when i leave her, i do sometimes do it in order to keep my own sanity. not sure if i sound logical here, but put in another way, i spend time with her so that i can preserve my own peace cos i know that i will get my peace with she is ok. and between this and time with friends, i'd place a higher priority on my own peace.

ok, i do not know if what i have written make sense. but well, bottom-line is - i am at peace with myself. and i have learned to balance and reconcile what i do with what i want. and learned how to get what i want when i want to get it. hmmm, i am going round again... better stop.

but yes, i do really appreciate their concern.

lol!