tongkat ali

well, i was chatting with natkean and dilbert this morning and the topic of tongkat ali surfaced. hmmm, frankly, due to my aging mind, i could not really recall how it came about other than i mentioned it. i think it must have been something to do with supplements, collagen or something, and that the conversation went on to someone saying collagen tasted like cum... haha, ok before i digress, yup, tongkat ali. i mentioned about tongkat ali and asked if the pharmacy natkean spoke about sells it. and he was kinda curious why i asked about it. of cos it is about impotence, i said. this was something i blogged about previously. well ok, to be exact, about the need to maintain a certain level of male health (you know...) and to stay healthy of cos. (ya... i can hear you guys going "ya rite!")

and talking about tongkat ali, i actually studied it when i was an undergrad some 26 years ago (gosh, that was a superbly long time ago)! i remembered clearly one day when we were in the midst of a field trip to the bukit timah forest and we came across a rather interesting looking plant. we stopped and my supervisor told us, with this cheeky grin on his face, that it was something men take to boost their sexual prowess. we quickly moved on after that and the topic was never brought up again. heh heh... anyway, the vernacular name "tongkat ali" means "ali's walking stick" in malay. i understood that the reference to "walking stick" was due to the fact that the plant typically has a central long stem, like a walking stick, and a nice rosette crown of compound leaves at the top. and as to why the name "ali", hmmm... perhaps the person who first used it was called "ali"? haha... whatever the case, the scientific name of this tropical plant that is endemic to this region is euricoma longifolia. this plant is commonly used by natives for its healing as well as its aphrodisiac qualities. ok, shan't go into the botanical details of this. you can read it here if you are curious enough! 

while it was not too well known commercially back then, the popularity of this plant has since spread  far and wide. products of this plant can be found in all sorts of forms and drinks now. just google it and you can find lots of it in the net. but beware, i read that there are many fake products too... and as for me, well... if there's something to take to boost my health, i guess it is ok right? 

heh heh...

;-)

picture from http://www.itsnature.org/plant_life/vegetation-plants/eurycoma-longifolia/

professional crossroads

here i am again, at another crossroad of my professional life. and it is even more difficult for me now compared to 3 years ago when i left service given my age. and as it stands now, there are many choices for me.

firstly, i have the option of going into general managership. for that matter, i have an interview coming up for a such a role in a private school next week. given the superbly wide span of responsibilities, i can expect it to pay relatively well. and assuming that i get the job, it would also mean i will be chopping myself off from what i am strong in and subjecting myself to a whole lot of stress. the opportunity cost would be tremendous if i take this up and realize downstream that it is not what i want.

secondly, there is this option of looking for a job related to what i am strong in. as it stands, i have applied for several positions, both in the government as well as private sectors. this option would allow me to perform what i am good at with some possible exposure to conduct training, something that i am passionate about. and renumeration-wise, i can expect the package to be relatively ok, not fantastic, but able allow me to sustain.

thirdly, there is the option of going on my own and assuming the role of an associate training and an associate coach. this is an interesting option and i will be able to do what i like, i.e, train and coach. there is currently a company that is very keen to sign me up. but the renumeration would be relatively unstable as it is paid on project basis and the package would not include areas such as medical benefits, cpf payouts etc...

lastly, i have the final option of giving up corporate life and do social work. of the few options, this would probably be the least stressful. and i can also expect this option to come with the lowest renumeration and i am not sure if i am able to sustain my livelihood if i choose this option...

sighs... crossroads indeed. i certainly need to sit down and chart out the details before i can make a more informed decision about what i should focus on as i move ahead. my gut feel as of now is that the last option is out. and in terms of priority, would it be option 2, 3 followed by 1? or 1, 2, 3? or 3, 2, 1? hmmm... i really need to sit down a reflect what i want... pay, strength or passion?

think think think. what would you do if you were me? any advice?

for now, i will sleep over it...

:-)

empty wait

remembered i wrote about going for 4 rounds of interview and then they told me they would make the decision end-dec? and by end-dec, the response the company gave was that they would review the decision end-jan? well... end-jan came and went. and upon checking with them again after the lunar new year break (yesterday to be specific), their response was that they have frozen all hiring and will only make the decision in jun this year. 

despite my jolly cheerful tone when i spoke with the headhunter, i felt a sense of betrayal. then again, there were no promises. the headhunter explained that there was some internal politics that the hiring manager had to contend with and it was really beyond her. well, i totally understand but i find it hard to swallow. darned! that is certainly not a professional way to handle recruitment! what the hell right? anyway, i wrote to her, and nicely told her that i will be moving on to look for other jobs, and that i continue to look forward to be able to be part of her team... cross the river but don't burn the bridge i reminded myself. 

frankly, i would be lying if i say i was not upset by this whole episode. any normal person would. after all the positive vibes, the 4 rounds of interviews, etc. but well, i told myself i have to accept it. what's not yours will not be yours. on the other hand, i would say that in a way, i had half-expected this to happen, despite sounding all positive about it. or perhaps i had been jaded... or perhaps i had harboured hopes about it sub-consciously. whatever... move on, i told myself. they do not deserve me. 

it didn't take long for this development to sink in. admittedly, in the last months, although i had continued with my job search, i must say i did not put in my full efforts into it. but yesterday itself, within the day itself, i surprised myself by actually applying 2 jobs within half a day! haha... well, i will be heading for an interview next week. it was something recommended by a friend from my previous organization. i must say that i am not really looking forward to this position, but let's see how. anything is better than nothing currently.

press on, press on...

:-)

拜天公

we celebrated the birthday of the jade emperor (天公生) on the evening of the eighth day of the lunar new year (last sunday evening). it was indeed a long a busy day for us, all the preparations, the sugar cane, cooking the meats, etc... it was an annual affair and a grand one indeed. and this was the only time of the year that we would transfer the urn that we use on the family altar for him. and of course, special attention would be accorded to the setting of the altar and all the associated paraphernalia (i understand from mum that the way the altar was arranged was something she learned from my grandparents decades ago. with specific baba influence, i supposed?).

interestingly, from what i read, i realized that many of the practices we do (like starting the prayers at 11pm and ending by midnight, offering of ang ku kuih, tee kueh, sugar canes, etc) are all very similar to what the the hokkiens and the peranakans in penang do! and as to the origins of this celebration, you can read more about it in this link...

haha!

:-)

missing bread

i usually buy and leave french loaves on the dining table as mum would eat them for her breakfast daily. and usually, i will buy 4 loaves at a go and they would last some 3-4 days, depending on mum's appetite. what happened was yesterday, when i left the house, i noted there were still 3 loaves of bread on the table. but when i returned, none was left. and staring at me with a guilty face and with her tail wagging slowly and lowly was none other than... yup, you guessed it. sapphie!

hmm! naughty girl! anyway, if this were to happen years ago, i would have probably given her a good trashing and/ or scolding. but these days, perhaps i have gotten used to it or that i am a lot more patient, i simply smiled at her and told her nicely not to do it again (like as though she understand)... haha! just looking at her looking at me with her guilty face was enough to tell me that she knew it was wrong. and come on, what else could you expect a dog to be right? she was simply being herself!

:-)

wt* pool sightings!

recently, i have seen some very interesting sights at the swimming pool and so i thought i should blog about it. and as i do so, i might as well include the many things i have seen before too! and yes, these were all sighted in our public pools. and incidentally, what i have listed below were all sighted at one particular pool! haha...

• parents who use normal diapers for their kids in the pool (!)
• children running around the pool naked
• children who wear swimming suits that are at least 2 sizes larger than what they need
• grossly obese woman with mega-love handles, gigantic arms, thunder thighs, etc...
• as above, and wearing translucent sarong
• as above, and sunbathing in skimpy bikinis
• as above, and snacking non-stop on nuts and carbonated drinks
• women wearing the tudung (religious headscarf) while sunbathing
• as above, and sat near gay men in skimpy trunks
• women who wear the skimpiest bikinis sunbathing
• as above, facedown and their bikini tops unstrapped (confirmed real ones... lol!)
• monk swimming
• men who wear underwear (those chinese brand ones) to swim
• men who wear tights over their swimming trunks
• men who wear 2 swimming trunks
• men who wear swimming trunks that are at least 2 sizes larger than what they need
• men who wear swimming trunks that are at least 2 sizes smaller than what they need
• men who wear g-strings
• men who wear skimpy swimming trunks
• as above, lie prone on the floor for so long it seemed like they are glued to it
• men who wear skin-coloured swimming trunks
• men who wear leopard-print swimming trunks
• men who wear tiger-print swimming trunks
• men who wear luminous-tone swimming trunks (esp lime green, bright blue, and deep pink)
• men who wear translucent swimming trunks (esp light coloured ones)
• as above, in the wading pool trunk became almost transparent!
• men who wear translucent g-strings
• men who wear nothing but a tiny towel
• men who wear cock-ring in their trunks
• men rubbing oil on every little cracks and crevices of their body
• men rubbing oil on every little cracks and crevices of each other's body
• men who jogs around the pool
• men who dance by the side of the swimming pool
• men who visits the pool toilet and not the pool/ tan
• men who does stretching in the pool toilet
• men who does ballet dance stretching in the pool toilet
• men who keeps showering non-stop in the pool toilet
• men who parades around in the pool toilet in birthday suits
• as above, but with a cock-ring and exposing themselves to selective audiences
• men who have sex openly in the pool toilet (!) 

doh! doh! doh! (and by the colour coding, you should know the category of people i am referring to...)

:-)

picture from http://www.sacramentogaymen.com

人日

last saturday was the seventh day of the chinese lunar new year and it was celebrated by many as 人日 (human day). and as usual, my phone was inundated with lotsa birthday greetings, after all that day was celebrated as a birthday for all humankind. as for many chinese in south east asia (more specifically, indonesia, malaysia and singapore), they would commemorate the day by having dinners with family and/ or friends. and importantly, the tossing and eating of the 鱼生 (yu sheng) or raw fish salad is a necessity during this dinner. 

and that was what bee & i did with schneider and natkean. it was a simple but heavy hokkien dinner followed by a round of poker game at bee's place! so it was an evening of food, food, food & more food, cookies, cookies cookies & more cookies, cards, and wine. and of cos, natkean was kinda stuck with the chinese serial that bee played. and above all, it was a simple but very very good break for me. considering the fact that the dinner was almost called off as mum went into a major emotional swing/ tantrum that very morning itself (that lasted through to sunday)...

:-)

picture from http://imgfave.com/search/food%20porn

i can't get hard (enough)!

feeling a little bored, i googled "sex and the middle-aged man" this morning. and surprisingly, a whole lot of resources appeared. scrolled down the list and one of them caught my attention. it was on erectile dysfunction (ed), aka unable to get hard, impotence, and so on. and considering that in the past few months, i do not seemed to get as hard as i used to, and that i need a longer time to orgasm (if i do indeed cum), i decided to read it up...

when i clicked on one of the links, i was put through some simple questions to determine my category and hey! no surprise! i am considered a "middle-aged man"! doh! anyway, the interesting thing i noted was that there is actually a questionnaire created for people to take as part of the process to determine the severity of their ed. there was the full version (which comprised 15 questions and that i tried but i cannot find the link to interpret the test results), and the shorter version that comprised only 5 questions. and interesting, as i navigate and answer the questions, i realized i had difficulty answering some of them. in a way, i had tensions with the functional approach to how  the questions were crafted. firstly, the questions crafted suggest that sex must be about penetration. it does not cater to men who choose to abstain from sex/ masturbate as a "norm". secondly, the questions all assumed that the men is always the top/ or plays the penetrative role, and that sex that occurs between 2 individuals have to be penetrative in nature. such narrowly scoped question certainly do not cover the breadth of a person's behaviour/ preference when it comes to sex. and lastly, it assumes that there is a certain frequency of penetrative sex that must occur for one's organ to be considered to be healthily functional.

and my goodness, whoever designed the questions should know never to include qualifiers/ conditions as part of the questions... "if this... if that..." hmmm... not an easy task answering the questions... if stress is a factor of ed, then answering the questionnaire itself would make a person soft straight away! i tried all sorts of different answers and the results i got were - that i am having anything from severe to moderate to mild ed! ok, ok, before i digress and make this post into an academic discussion on how to craft good questionnaire questions, let me get back to talk about ed. bottom line, a questionnaire is nothing but one of the many tools used to help diagnose ed, one needs to see it in the full perspective of other means including the need to see and discuss the issue with a professional/ doctor.

well, perhaps the assuring thing that i came to realize was that all middle-aged person will at some point experience a decreased in his libido, and the degree of hardness in his erections. but having said that, all middle-aged person should and can continue to enjoy sex well into old age. there are also things that one should make a conscious efforts to do and that include (1) to stay off alcohol, (2) to not smoke, (3) to exercise regularly, eat right and to maintain a healthy lifestyle, and finally, (4) to manage one's stress. and reflecting, i can only conclude that what is affecting me is point number 4. 

and so, what i conclude here that the days where i can get so hard i felt it could burst again and again and again... is over. or more accurately, those days were over a long time back!

haha...

picture from http://www.vuotquaroiloancuong.com/

mrt on fire!

now i finally know the reason behind the mrt track fire yesterday! just take a look at the picture! darned! with this kinda public protrusion, anyone would be on fire! and hey! what have i been missing all these years! time to change to pubic, oops i mean, public transport...

well, i got this picture from a friend and i forwarded it to some friends, all guys and a girl. of cos, all the guys, yes, every single one asked about and commented on his family jewel. and the girl? her reply was "i wonder what he was reading" haha! talk about how men's brain are wired differently from women's brain. then again, gay men are supposed to be no different from woman when it comes to such things. right? 

but ya... looking at the picture, that guy must be gay. his dressing and colours were just too co-ordinated! and oooo, look at those arms! 

*like*

(picture cropped to minimize the guy's face...)

happy v day

tomorrow is valentines day. 

hmmm... it seemed like a non-event for many this year, especially when everyone is still in the thick of the lny celebrations. or wait! could it be that for me, becos i don't really celebrate it, that is why i feel it is a non-event? whatever... anyway, for me and bee, admittedly, we celebrated it during our early years by going to restaurants for a nice dinner and drink wine. but we realized we were spending a lot of money over lousy mass-produced food and lousy cheap wines. subsequently, we did our quiet valentines meal a day or 2 before. and in recent years, valentines slowly became a non-event.

personally, i thought the idea of having a day to commemorate and celebrate love is a good one. but these days, it has been over commercialized and over-hyped. and everyone who celebrates it seemed to wanna do it to proof a point and/ or to outdo others. there must be roses, there must be a western meal (duh! why not zichar? or hokkien mee? or mee pok tar hiam cheo chueh chueh?), there must be wine, and for some, this is the day give his/ her first strawberry/ cherry experience to that someone. then again, there aren't many virgins left these days. hah! i mean, wtf right? haha... herd mentality at play. sighs. after all, if the heart is at the right place, everyday can be that romantic valentines day that we share with that special someone, right?

and talking about valentines meal, i met bee for lunch today. and since keeping my hair recently, it is now a little messy long and i decided to gel it and finger comb it backwards. and during lunch, bee commented "hmmm, you are balding..." haha! ok, i have digressed. let's get back to valentines. perhaps it is a good thing stretch the concept of love, since we are at it! let's wish everyone around us love, our parents, our family, our partner(s), our lover(s), our friends, just about anyone...  

happy valentines everyone!

picture from www. gaypolitics. com

12km...

i just ran 12km. heh heh... well, i actually surprised myself. wanted to do a long run to burn away all the food i had over the past few days. kinda felt guilty about it but had not planned for 12km per se. nonetheless, i just ran and ran and ran. and by the time i completed the full route, my runkeeper registered 12km. heh heh... and i was like oh wow... 

interestingly, as i ran, i thought of lots of things. work, friends, life in general, blanking off, and of cos, the number of calories i'd be burning. and was kept crossing my mind was - 1 kueh tart is equivalent to about 65-70 calories. so, if my run can burn 1000 calories, i would be able to burn about 14-15 kueh tarts... and this kept my mind occupied. it took away the boredom away at times. and it was rather meditative i must say. so, in the end, i completed 12km. this is equivalent to about 920 calories or 13-14 kueh tarts. 

haha!

ps: but well, i realized i had blisters on my middle toe after the run! aiyoh... the last time i had blisters was more than a decade ago!

picture of pineapple tarts from http://singaporecoupons.blogspot.sg

an omg-moment!

this morning, i had an "omg-moment". i got an email from someone. and it was not just anyone, but someone from my primary school! yup! primary school! that was like almost 40 years ago! in his attempt to reconnect with old friends, he had googled my primary school name and eventually found his way to my blog. and despite my not reflecting too much of my name in this blog, he managed to deduce my identity! heh heh...

but i must confess. initially, i felt a little bewildered. the email i received had a name that comprised an english name and a surname. the structure of the name and the name itself did not click. in fact, such names were not very common during those days. but when i opened and read the email, the sender identified himself and spelt out his full chinese name. and he went on to mention a couple of other names, i was like - omg omg omg... these were names from my distant past! and for that moment, i had lots of flashbacks! i felt like a little boy all over again! haha!

i replied the email quickly and by afternoon, we had exchanged our numbers and spoke over the phone. man! it felt good. 

lol!

of kisses & smooches

i shall write a short post about kissing in this entry. 

recently, i watched a tv serial where the girl was superbly health conscious. or rather, she's superbly cleanliness conscious. well, not ocd per se, just super super cleanliness conscious. and in one particular episode, during a date, her boyfriend wanted to kiss her and she freaked out and said that she would be exposed to millions of bacteria from her boyfriend. haha... it was quite funny, although true (see this link about kisses). but really, if we were to be so conscious about such things, then we might as well forget about living right? heh heh. then again, i must say here that there are a few things related to smells, hygiene and habits that you need to observe when lip-locking...

• if you are a smoker, gargle and rinse with a mouth wash before you kiss, smokers' breathe and the taste of smoke/ nicotine can be very uncomfortable, especially to non-smokers.

• bad breath can be very unbearable... 'nuff said.

• and associated with bad breath is bad body odor. body odors can kill! nothing beats getting yourself a nice and fresh before you kiss/ engage in intimacy with someone. and this includes wherever possible, to take a nice shower! especially after you run, or worst still, if you are heavily obese and exude a strong smell.

• also, if you have dry mouth/ dry chapped lips, chances are you also have bad breath, please please hydrate, drink and gargle. worst still, imagine kissing and smooching halfway and it starts to bleed. eeks!

• when you french kiss, don't suck like there's no tomorrow! you don't want to suck the life out of the person you are kissing. play with your tongue. make it wet! wet kisses are so erotic! but certainly, don't leave a wet floor of drools... heh heh.

• and remember, when french kissing - don't suck until you taste blood. we need lovers, not draculas in this world! haha...

• nibble sensitively if you wish to, it can be rather fun, but don't bite (especially when you french kiss)! arghhhh... 

• if you have cold sore, stay far far away. last you want is to infect your partner with it! 

• if you have mustache, for goodness sake, trim... last thing you want is to have the hair stuck between your teeth. having a by-the-way tooth flossing is fine, but imagine the hair getting stuck (or worst still, hair from the nose or even lagi worst, hair from down there) in between your teeth, aiyoooooooh!

• and if you want to have something in your mouth to freshen your breath, eg chewing gum, mint, etc... get rid of it before kissing. the last thing you want is to have someone choke on it halfway through...

and as a final point, it is always a good idea to eat a lot of fruits (especially citrus fruits) and drink lotsa water. makes everything about you fresh and oh, by the way, i read that it makes you (you know...) taste sweet too.

hahaha...

how was your lny?

"how was your lunar new year (lny) uncle?" that was a question posed to me by someone via whatsapp. well... it's a loaded question if you want to read deep into it. but as usual, i reply loaded question with an equally loaded answer. i said "i had a very uncle lny"!

heh heh... then again, really, for many singles and that includes all glbts, lnys are something to be avoided. i mean, with the common questions related to "when are you getting a boyfriend/ girlfriend?", "when are you getting married?" etc, it has become somewhat of a terror festival. can't people just simply don't ask about such things during lunar new years? haha... then again, if people don't ask about such things, what else can they ask right? there are only so much people can talk about the rain and the clouds... so questions related to first son, to second son, to third son (and daughters) will invariably come into the conversation right? so, it was for such reasons that many single people hide themselves from visiting relatives or visit relatives... well, perhaps it is ok and perfectly fine when one is young, but when one gets into the mid-20s, hmmm...

as for me, i do enjoy such gatherings. and over the years, i have learned to dodge such questions. my answers to questions from aunties about "when am i getting married" will include lines like "oh, when my turn comes, i will sure invite you one..." or "aiyah, don't ask me la, your son also not married what? so when is he getting married?" or "when your son get married, i will also get married lor" (for that record, my cousin's gay too so i know i will not be treading into deep waters with such answers)... and of cos in recent years, "aiyah, nowadays getting married is no longer in fashion! my mum always says in future got someone to look after me, who knows, in future i will have to look after her instead..." and then i will laugh it off. so...

anyway, back to the question "how as your lny uncle?", well, frankly, i visited bee and a close friend. and today i brought my mum to visit my brother and to look after my nephew (he is such a bundle of joy at 2 months old!). that was it. otherwise, it was simply resting at home, watching tv and eating lny goodies. then again, lny is still not over yet. there are still 12 days to go. so... yup, tomorrow, we will be receiving the kitchen god from heaven (or at least, my brother will be doing it), this saturday (7th day of lny), we will be celebrating man's birthday by having yu sheng, and on sunday (8th day of lny), we will be celebrating the celestial god's birthday by making offering at midnight. and finally on the 15th day of lny, we will be having a small reunion dinner again before the lny celebrations formally ends. and as to the question about whether i receive any ang pows, yes i did. nowadays, i will not reject ang pows like i previously did. instead, i would accept it graciously when given. after all, there is joy in giving, there is joy in receiving, and i am sure i give people the joy and satisfaction to know that i am receiving what they offer right? 

so, how was your lny thus far?

haha... 

wrong lny greeting!

i get lots of sms/ whatsapp greetings from friends. and i do really really appreciate the fact that my friends remembered me and had send me well-wishes. thank you thank you thank you!

but frankly, i have my reservations about the content of many of the mass-send messages. you see, over the past couple of years, i have seen people getting really creative about these messages. they make use of words to create pictures, they use emoticons, etc. and in very recent months, i see an increased use of those self-made cartoons. truth be told, my hair stands when i listen to the screechy voice. eeeeeks! well, i must say that initially in the first couple of festivals, it was quite interesting to see all the different messages. very refreshing compared to the simple greetings, but nowadays, i look forward to simple greetings! mass send messages has become somewhat of a bore to me. too much of it and you feel irked by them, especially when they carry a lot of mistakes. and i noticed people have gone as far as to forward the messages they received without giving a hoot about what the content was... the following are 3 very glaring mistakes i see...

• forwarding messages without reading them and in the process, also forward the signature block of the person who had forwarded the message to them. i once got a message from a girl and at the bottom of the message, it was signed off by a guy and his wife!

• forwarding messages from previous year without realizing that the details were related to the year before. case in point was this year, year of the snake (蛇). i have gotten this message titled  蛇来了 from many people. this message has many 4-character phrases that depict some good auspicious wishes. and interestingly, the person who composed the initial greeting had duplicated the series of wishes 5 times and aligned them into a vertical chain such that when one scrolls the message quickly, the effect was that of a slithering reptile. but when you read closely, you will realize that there were at least 5 phrases that went "龙年吉祥" and the word "龙年" or "dragon year" suggests the message was meant for last year!

• forwarding messages from another country without realizing it. i suspect the message 蛇来了 (as mentioned above) originated from taiwan. this was becos i noticed there were some characters that looked suspiciously unfamiliar. i suspect they are characters invented in taiwan as part of their efforts to redefine/ simplify the chinese language. then again, my chinese is not that good and so i am not too sure if this was indeed so. nonetheless, i queried the girl (who smsed that message to me) about the origins of the message, she said she got it from a hong kong friend... haha...

so when i get such creatively composed messages, i refused to read them anymore. i simply delete them and reply with a "haha...". but of cos, i reiterate here - i do appreciate the fact that my friends remembered me and had send me a greeting. it was the content that i cringed. frankly, i feel that when one wants to send a greeting, one should do it from the heart. cos when you do it from your heart, you will vet and proof-read them, you will personalize them and you will sign it off well. after all, it is from no one else but you and you own it. for the above example, i initially wondered if i could also use it too. but i thought it wouldn't be nice to send out things i didn't vet through and whewed when i saw the mistake, i decided to simply delete it! lol! so, after all these experiences, i decided to simply send out a simple greeting. something that is personalized, and carry a simple greetings. something that is as simple as "dear jeff, happy lunar new year". and yup, i really appreciate such greetings, and i am sure you too.

:-)

re-cycled food

so, let's talk about lunar new year food...

i always find it interesting and rather ironic that we have excellent freshly cooked food for our reunion dinners. and then we eat all the left overs on the first day of the lunar new year, or for that matter, first 2-3 days. haha... then again, you cannot underestimate left over food. food that has been left over make the best dishes for rice after they are recooked again. in fact, many of the best asian cookings are food that had been stewed over and over again. just think about kong bak (stewed pork, hokkien style), chap chye (stewed vegetables, hokkien/ nonya style), bibimbap (rice mixed with stewed beef and assortment of vegetables, korean style), and for that matter, curry chicken that has been cooked over and over again! yummy right? haha... from another perspective, i think we asians (particularly, chinese) are one of the most eco-friendly people... we leave almost nothing behind. heheh...

but i would go further to posit that this is a result of environmental conditioning. a case of survival cos traditionally and historically speaking, before the invention of the refrigerators, many would preserve meats, vegetables, fruits, (through drying and the use of sugar/ salt/ wax/ etc) when winter approaches and eat them through the winter. in fact, as recent as in the 90s, i still see chinese people in their villages kill their pigs and hang them out to freeze just like how they dry their laundry! and with the coming of the lunar new years, or to celebrate the arrival of spring, they would bring out all the leftover preserved meats, stewed and soften them into delicacies and wallop them! after all, food kept through the moist weather of spring will likely spoil due to moulds and what have yous! so... 

but of cos, many of these practices had been retained despite the fact that many mainland chinese had migrated to warmer countries such as malaysia and singapore. so, here in my family, we continue to enjoy lup cheong (preserved pork sausage), stew our roast pork, chap chye, etc... haha! and so for lunar new year this year, it was simply food and more food! yup, jiak jiak jiak! i had roast duck, roast pork, steamed chicken, babi ponteh (nonya kong bak), steamed fish (must have cos fish or yu sound like abundance in chinese), tofu fried with leek (suan for prosperity, cos the word suan [or leek in hokkien] sounds like "count" or "count money")... of cos, some other common dishes that we used to have in recent years include curry chicken, ayam buah keluak, ngoh hiang, steamboat, etc etc etc...

so what did you have for your lunar new year reunion dinners and on the new year itself?

yums!

happy & ssssexy lny...

the chinese lunar year coinciding with the gregorian 2013 is the year of the snake, to be exact, the year of the black water snake.

frankly, i dislike snakes. it has been ingrained into my psyche since young that snakes are fearsome creatures. but i must mention that historically, or traditionally in the asian context, snakes have been featured as good and successful creatures. you can see lots of examples snakes being featured many hindu and buddhist stories in benevolent and altruistic acts. and across many parts of asia, especially south asia, it is clear that many have this fear yet deep reverence towards snakes. but this is not so amongst many people who, i suspect, are exposed to western cultures and/ or the christian religion. in christianity, the snake was featured as evil/ satan-manifest and was seen tempting adam to eat the apple, as was the snake/ serpent that was described in quite fearful details in genesis chapter 3, as well as the revelation in the bible. it was perhaps the depiction of the snake in such negative ways that created a less than positive impression of the snake amongst people. whatever the case, i have never liked snakes since young.

for the past, major incidents had happened during snake years. these include the sep 11 terrorist attacks 2001, tiananmen incident 1989, and so on. thus, the forecasts by many fengshui masters for 2013 is not as optimistic. as for me, i couldn't really remember how i felt 12 years ago during 2001, the last year of the snake, but for 2013, i can say i don't feel too excited about it. pictures of snakes still give me the creeps... so... it is with this fear that i cringed when i see lunar new year documentaries showing how people in northern asia flock to keep snakes as pets, make live snake offerings in temples, etc. and i feel somewhat uneasy when i get lunar new year greetings in sms/ whatsapp showing pictures of snakes. eeeeeee... talk about letting snakes into your house! but of cos, like it or hate it, the year of the black water snake is upon us. we have no choice but to embrace it. and since you can't wish it away, might as well make the best of it it (no matter how uneasy you might feel)... so here's wishing one and all a...

happy & ssssexy lunar new year!
* 新年快乐 *

first picture send to me via whatsapp by friends and second picture from http://www.kids-n-fun.com/Wallpaper/Chinese-new-year-widewcreen/6984/Chinese-new-year-widewcreen...

ps: jokingly, i tell people, rather that the picture of the snake tail and the masculine body, i'd rather have the snake (with the head of cos) of the male body... hiak hiak hiak...

pps: i had wanted to put a picture of a black water snake in this post but when i did a google image search and saw the pictures, i really cringed and decided to use a picture of 2 mandarin oranges instead... 

reunion dinner... ssss...

in previous 2 years, mum, bee and i would have our reunion dinner at home. but this year, mum and i had a reunion dinner with my second sis's family on the eve of the eve of the lunar new year, and again on the eve of the lunar new year with my brother's family. at the first glance superficially (especially if you are not chinese), it sound kinda defeating to call it a reunion dinner when there were 2 dinners. and this is not considering the fact that i am not having any reunion dinner myself (which again sounds kinda illogical cos as an unmarried person, who do i have reunion dinners with? haha...). after all, reunion dinners are for family units to come together. it boils down to how we define the family unit.

for the first reunion dinner was my sis's family reunion dinner. the family unit to be referred to was my brother-in-law's family and not ours (my family as defined by my dad's family) per se. we were just joining in the dinner. and although she also invited bee along, i thought it was not a good idea given mum's mental state. nonetheless, it was a good dinner although not all of her family was there. internal inter-sibling squabbles again, my sis lamented. as for me, i took it in stride. we went through the same when we were younger i told my sis. so... we had a little scare during the dinner. mum choked on the prawns. thankfully, she had chewed the prawn sufficiently and it went in after a while. she stopped the dinner while we carried on. but the amount of food was really too much. the food prepared was for 10, but there were only 6-7 of us. so in the end, we had all the remainder packed.

as for the second dinner, it was my brother's family unit. and similarly we just joined in. but of cos, if we were to see it from a chinese male-centric point of view, the reunion dinner at my brother's place could be considered more significant. and as for mum and i, we were to be considered important guests for the dinner. my mum would naturally be seen as an elder (a traditional chinese family is, surprisingly, rather matriarchal in nature in my opinion). and as for me, i would naturally assume the role of my dad following my dad's demise. and while all these were not uttered, the silent respect my brother accord to me during major festivals and prayers such as the lunar new year and the birthday of the celestial gods was obvious. this was kinda interesting cos he has a history of arguing and fighting with me. and during the fights, it could be rather intense and hostile. then again... whatever the case, just enjoy the time as it occurs la, i told myself. when my mum passes on in the near future, nobody will know what will happen. for all you know, we may end up the way like how my eldest sis is treating me now. haha...  let time be the judge. 

but for now, let's just focus on the fact that it is the lunar new year period, and familial ties are looked upon with a little more significance. after all, that is what lunar new new is about these days, getting back of the family unit. it was a good 2 days of reunion dinners. think i need to increase my running and exercising again after all the eating!

:-)

lunar new year ang pows

chinese new year/ lunar new year is round the corner. this is the time of the year where a lot of people ponder whether they qualify to give/ receive ang pows (red packets that contain money) and how much to pack in the ang pows. the following are some guidelines and principles that i see over the years...

"qualification" to give/ receive ang pows

• all married persons are qualified to give ang pows
• for those who have yet to celebrate their first wedding anniversary (are in the first year after their wedding), they also qualify to receive ang pows.
• people who are not married can receive ang pows. but generally speaking, for singles who are older (mid-30s and above), they generally try not to accept the ang pows out of courtesy.
• people who are considered elderly (usually of the previous generation) can receive ang pows as they are recognized as elders. there not strict rules regarding the age of the person per se. but as a guide, it is acceptable to give anyone in their 70s and above as a mark of respect.
• if you are a boss, regardless of whether you are married or not, my personal take is that it is a good practice to give ang pows to your staff. after all, it is a mark of respect for and in recognition of your staffs' contributions and support.

as for the amount to pack, if i may say, there are no standard rates. traditionally, it is not the money that counts, but the thoughts behind it. nonetheless, in today's context, the amount to pack has become a sensitive topic given the so called "face"-value behind it, especially amongst the younger ones (product of a more materialistic environment? haha!). it's an ego thing. also, it would not be so nice if the amount given is below what people give to us/ our children. the general principle is that the closer you are to the person, the bigger (the more money you pack in) the ang pow. and the amount is usually in even numbers with a preference to round off to the nearest 10's or ending with "8". the following are the possible rates that can be used (all figures are in singapore dollar):

family elders/ elderly relatives

• parents/ parents-in-law and elderly relatives - $68, $88, S100 or multiples of hundreds.

children of relatives

• very close relatives - $10, $12, $20
• close relatives - $8, $10
• normal relatives - $4, $8*
• distant relatives - $4*

children of friends/ non-relatives

• very close friends - $10, $12, $20
• close friends - $8, $10
• normal friends - $4 (i hesitate to up this to $8)*
• acquaintances - $4*

friends/ contemporaries

• very close friends - $20, $50 (not necessary to give but if really want to, it is ok)
• normal friends - no requirements

office/ colleagues @ workplace

• money is a sensitive issue at the workplace, so what i have done before is to pool monies from some of my team of senior staff and use this money to purchase lottery tickets and distribute them to my staff in ang pows (big sweep, 4d or toto tickets)
• to do this, you have the option of buying single tickets for each staff; or buy a series of number and share the winnings equally if you win. the pros and cons of the different methods are clear
• all monies packed/ used to buy lottery tickets need to be properly accounted for and audited by a neutral party

again, i reiterate here that there are no standard rates. there are of cos some people who are superbly calculative and work out the potential amount they will get by bringing their children around and balance with the potential amount they will need to give out, but this is really laborious. but well, whatever works for one may not work for others. ultimately, i think the best principle is to pack the ang pows according to your means.

tips on packing ang pows

• make sure the ang pows packed with different denominations are easily recognized. you won't want to give wrong amounts by mistake. you can consider packing different denominations in different types of ang pow packets. while it is ok to give more, it would be really embarrassing if you give a lot less. 
• always be prepared with more ang pows with different denominations when you do your visiting. you don't want to get caught with no ang pows when and if there are additional visitors to your visit locations.
• bring extra cash and empty ang pow jackets to cater to contingencies.
• for some people (especially cantonese), they like to give 2 ang pows together. after all even numbers are considered lucky. but this is not a must.

have a good time preparing for the lunar new year!

* and as mentioned by sam, there is an increasing preference to put $6 instead given that the number "4" sounds inauspicious when pronounced in chinese language/ dialect variants. this is also in view of the smaller sing-dollar and that many people are more willing to increase the amount (perhaps they are better off?) these days.

omg!

yesterday, after mum came home from her elderly rehab center, she went straight to the sofa to take a rest. and then she took out her handphone and started pressing some buttons. as usual she seemed so engrossed in it, staring at the buttons closely and pressing them very deliberately, one by one. i assumed she was trying to call one of my siblings and left her alone. i didn't want to ask her about it in case she feels i am encroaching into her personal space. it went on for quite a while. probably 5min. hmmm, perhaps she had problems calling out and perhaps she could do with some help... and i asked her who was she trying to call, and whether she needed me to help her call and she replied "i am trying to (switch) on the tv." and with my questioning, she suddenly realized she was pressing her handphone and not the remote control. we have a little chuckle over it.

on the surface, this was actually quite funny. but thinking deeper, it was probably another indication of her gradual lose of her cognitive abilities. to be expected i supposed. need to note this down and to report to the doctor when we visit him in 2 weeks' time. but well, let's just have a laugh over it. it's good to learn to laugh at our acts once a while. and we can do so without guilt if we are laughing at the act and not the person...

right?

:-)

man-breasts

oooo, yeah! just look at the hotties! and yes! such videos are equally relevant to men too! and i am sure we won't disagree! heh heh! good reminder to check for breast cancer... 

and talking about t-l-c, hmmm, in "our" context, it could also mean - touch, lick and cum! haha! notti notti! ooo, why do i feel so hot now. did someone just turned off the air-con?

haha!

a singaporean lunar new year

found this video in aiden's site - a newly released lunar new year song. composed and performed by a singaporean singing group "the animal parade". and it is on the perennial theme of family lineage during lunar new years. well, admittedly, the first impression wasn't very good as i couldn't really catch what they were singing. but the song kinda build on you as you listen. also, make sure you keep the lyrics turned on so that you can catch the local hokkien lingo and words... ah soh, ah chek, ah sim, ah pek, etc etc etc... enjoy!

and purleese la, guys in drags should have their armpits shaved! interestingly, from the tone of the lyrics, i am sure it suggests a new generation that is more vocal against traditional demands of setting up family etc. also, does the guys in drags (which i believe are straight) also suggest a new younger generation that more accepting of glbts? perhaps, perhaps not. then again, just enjoy the song la!

:-)

adjusted routines

since the start of this year, i have changed my weekly routine... this was, in part, due to my resolution to lead a more balanced life with more time for myself, but also in view of mum's change in behavior. she now resists going out and prefers to stay at home. me, on my part, would also try to get her to be desensitized to me leaving the house. so, i make sure i leave the house daily for my exercise in the evenings (even if it was to do nothing but some push ups)... yup, as a result, my routine has changed.

weekdays

0800: self-time (wake up, wash up)

0830: dog-time (bring dog to pee/ shit) #

0900: self-time (breakfast, read newspaper, look for job, etc)

1500: must be at home prep for mum's return 

(if she does not see me at home when she returns from rehab, high chance of her going emo and throw tantrums)

1545: mum-time (watch tv or do anything with her around)

1700: prep dinner
(must show mum or else she will not eat for fear of me poisoning the food)

1815: dog-time (bring dog to pee/ shit)

1830: mum-time (dinner/ watch tv)

2015: self-time (exercise/ run) (must leave house)

2130: mum-time (come home, administer medication to her)

2145: dog-time (bring dog to pee/ shit)

2200: self-time
(lock myself in my room/ bath, work, relax, surf net, etc) *

2359: sleep-time...

# to leave the room no earlier than 0825 to minimize interaction with mum and to prevent her from asking too much question about whether i leave the house the night before or whether i will be meeting bad people when she goes to the rehab center (at 0845)

* must be in my room else mum will suspect i go out to plan how to harm her

weekends

0845: self-time (wake up, wash up)

0915: dog-time (bring dog to pee/ shit) ##

0930: self-time (breakfast, read newspaper, look for job, etc) @

1030: prep lunch
(must show mum or else she will not eat for fear of me poisoning the food)

1200: mum-time (lunch)

1230: house-work (in mum's presence)

1630: self-time (tea, buy things, etc)

1700: prep dinner
(must show mum or else she will not eat for fear of me poisoning the food)

1815: dog-time (bring dog to pee/ shit)

1830: mum-time (dinner/ watch tv)

2015: self-time (exercise/ run) (must leave house)

2130: mum-time (come home, administer medication to her)

2145: dog-time (bring dog to pee/ shit)

2200: self-time
(lock myself in my room/ bath, work, relax, surf net, etc) *

2359: sleep-time...

# to leave the room no earlier than 0910 to minimize interaction with mum and to prevent her from asking too much question about whether i leave the house the night before 
@ bee to join me for breakfast whenever possible
* must be in my room else mum will suspect i go out to plan how to harm her

similar routines largely, and as usual, need lotsa preparations for mum if there are any deviations (eg to attend a dinner). in a large way, the time is more spread towards me compared to the previous routine. and i try to make more time to go out to meet up with friends/ bee for dinners, etc. in addition, bee and i would meet up whenever i head out for breakfast/ meals. 

on repeat mode...

ah long... o$p$

we had a scare this afternoon... bee came over for lunch and had to rush off suddenly. someone had apparently splashed paint onto the main door of his recently renovated flat. and after all the drama (including a false alarm where the police was activated to catch someone, who turned out to be a contractor. haha!) and investigations at the various government agencies, he found out the previous owner had borrowed money from a loan-shark... 

sighs... 

not a nice thing to happen just before the lunar new year.

picture from http://entertainment.xin.msn.com/en/tv/channel-5/programmes/odollarpdollar

ass-u-me

making assumptions always make an ass out of u and me. and it is funny how many of us have this habit of doing so when we are exposed to a fact / occurrence. and without thinking, we make assumptions and draw wrong conclusions. and worst still, we create unnecessary misunderstandings and tensions in the process. here's some examples (facts are in blue and assumptions are highlighted in red)...

• due to paranoia, mum has this constant tension about me going out of the house. she believes i am meeting people to plan to harm her. and she would call me whenever she attends the elderly rehabilitation day care. and many a time, i'll miss her call as i did not hear the phone ring. and when i finally answered/ return her call, she would scream at me - where are you now? go out again is it!?!?!?!?! and when she returns, she would pull a long black face, and not talk to me.

• mum has this habit of giving sapphie food behind my back and i have asked her not to do so many a times. and recently, during over casual conversation, i mentioned that sapphie vomited and had diarrhea. immediately, she turned defensive and replied i did not give her anything to eat! (the assumption that i am blaming her is not verbalized here)

• we organize a gathering and send out an invite via whatsapp, facebook, etc... and after a couple of days, the responses from invitees were not very forthcoming, and we assumed that no one is interested and cancel gathering.

• one day, i decided to clean away all my facebook status updates and delete the photos in it. and next thing i know, i get an sms from a friend. he sounded superbly upset. his sms read to the following effect - why did you block me in facebook? what did i do to offend you? why must you do this to me? hmmm... worst case of assuming people are getting personal.

• i started exercising every evening since dec 12. and i would wash my pt attire daily after my exercise. sweaty clothes do not smell good when left in the room overnight. as for mum's and my other laundry, i do it twice a week when there is enough volume enough to use the washing machine. and one day, i found all of mum's laundry hung out to dry. i asked her why she did the laundry despite the fact that i had been the one doing it, and she said - nowadays you only wash your own clothes, so since you don't want to wash mine, i will do it myself...

there are just too many entries to this post. and my point is, when you hear something/ see something happen, do not make assumptions! if not sure of the reason/s, ask. talk. check. do anything to clarify but don't make assumptions and jump to conclusions! and interestingly, while it was not intended, it seemed like many of the examples and tensions are from mum... (and i wondered if this is how her generation conducted themselves).

haha!

picture from http://www.disputeresolutioncounsel.com/2011/05/have-you-checked-your-assumptions-lately/

"unemployed" is a bad word

whenever people ask me what am i doing now (as in what line am i in and what do i do for a living), i tell them without thinking twice that i am unemployed. and when they hear that, you can only conclude from their responses that they had made some assumptions about why you are unemployed and drew all sorts of conclusions as to how you are managing and surviving given your "unemployed" status. and more often than not, these assumptions and conclusions are totally wrong! 

from the many people that have asked me this question, their response may range from oh, i am sorry... or oh... and their words would just peter off to errr, (silence) hmmm, ok, errr... well, if you need money, i can lend you, but up to a certain amount. i think they simply do not know how to reply to such a straight forward reply from me. haha. sometimes, to prevent any awkwardness on their part, i would quickly add, oh i took time off to look after my mum, or i wanted to take a break... or something along these lines. interestingly, a couple of people reacted like as though i have done something super wrong and that as a result, i have been sacked. somehow, there is this social stigma about being unemployed here! even my mum. she sees unemployment as an embarrassment. and when people around the estate or in her rehabilitation center ask her, she would lie to them and say, he is on leave. of course, some people would politely tell me i should not use the term unemployed and offered alternate suggestions like "i am in between jobs". come on, people, there is nothing wrong being unemployed! let's call a spade a spade! 

in fact, to me, being unemployed is a choice. i decided that i want to stop working and i stopped. simple as that. even if it is temporarily. and there is no need to make all sorts of assumptions as to why i am unemployed. if you want to know the details, just ask. and for goodness sake, lay to rest thoughts like he is useless, he is incompetent, etc. and rather than see it as a negative thing, why don't you see it as wah! this person has balls of steel! he can and dare to take a break! he is really something! and yes, although my finances are tight, and i am careful with how i spend my money, and i am surviving alright. so there is no need to draw the conclusion that i am broke and would be going around borrowing money and expecting people to pity me! sighs.

ok, i shall stop here. i am simply ranting and realized i am going round and round... need time to organize my thoughts...

jobs search status...

have been unemployed since early oct 12. and to many, it seemed like i have not done anything but simply wait for the (yes, the) job to come. well, in a way, yes but in another way, no. 

yes, becos i was really looking forward to this job. after the 4 rounds of interviews, the chemistry was really good and, considering how things had unfolded a lot a lot better than i had expected, i felt good. very good for that matter. and from their hr head herself, that they are very happy with me and that they will get back to me. so, in a way, the positive vibes i got from them gave me a lot of hopes. (status update: till now, they have not gotten back despite saying they will try to get back by end-jan) so... a couple of my hr friends told me it is normal, that big companies will need time to sort things out. still, i couldn't but felt a little lost currently.

no, becos i was also looking around. ok, granted i wasn't looking around as aggressively as i had wanted due to the positive vibes i got, but i did looked. and the job market was slow in nov/ dec considering it was end of the year, christmas season, new year and all. and while i am beginning to see some activity in the job portals, i do not really expect to see much actions and hiring until after lunar new year next week. also, i think i must have forwarded my resumé to perhaps 4-6 headhunters. still, there was not much developments other than one of the headhunter calling me up for a chat. i was also thankful for the fact that some friends had called me up, and offered information about opportunities in roles such as associate trainers. for these, i have gone for one of the interview and the interviewer was very impressed with what i have to offer. nonetheless, i told her that i will only get back to her once i get a better clarity of the job offer that i have been waiting... otherwise, i continue to look at job portals, check out the recruitment sections of the local papers, talk to friends about possible opportunities etc...

so, the question is - am i demoralized? am i depressed? nope, i am sure i am not. i think i am holding quite well although i do admit there were occasions where i felt a little bored and uncertain about the immediate future. otherwise, in terms of stress, if any, they come from my mum. no one else. it has become a daily affair where i have to manage and get use to her suspicions and emotional abuse. must admit i have still not gotten used to it and still trying very hard not to internalise all the nonsense she throws at me daily. but well, that is another story. 

wedding bells

got the photo of my eldest niece (daughter of my eldest sis) in her wedding gown from my second sis.  felt so happy to see it. i think it was a photo shoot session. her wedding is the first amongst the next generation in my family. such a joy! seeing the photo makes me smile! she looked so pretty! it seemed not too long ago when i carried her in my arms and rocked her to sleep! and she's getting married soon! haha... nonetheless, i am not sure whether the wedding had actually taken place. but i suspect not cos i also learned that my eldest sis will not be inviting me nor my second sis to the wedding dinner. not sure about my second sis, but for me, it is cos my eldest sis has this grudge against me for not converting dad to christianity before he died. well...

whatever the case, the tensions of my generation should not translate to unhappiness for the next generation. not getting invited for the dinner is no big deal, what's key is that my niece will be getting married and i feel so very happy for her! 

wish her the very best in her life and that she will be happy forever!

:-)

picture from http://www.tuscanaresort.com/tuscana-poolside-weddings/

立春/ 送神 2013

been superbly busy with spring cleaning over the last couple of weeks in preparation for the lunar new year. and tomorrow is 立春, or the official start of spring. it is also considered the minor new year for the year of the snake and coincides with the day where traditionally, the chinese people would send off their household gods or kitchen gods to heaven (送神).

and talking about 送神, my family used to do it when i was much younger. and sending off the gods would be an important affair with mum setting up the home's altar and making offerings of fruits and kueh bakul (traditional chinese cake made of caramelized sugar). the belief is that by offering such sugary cakes to the household gods before they depart, they would say good things about the family when they report to the celestial god in heaven. the other explanation was that becos the caramelized sugar is sticky, the mouth of the household gods would be all sticky and they could not say too much bad things. quite funny right? i can imagine how busy and crowded heaven would be cos suddenly there will be a boom and overcrowding in heaven with all the household gods visiting. ok, better not spew such nonsense.

anyway, back to spring cleaning. most of us would symbolically finish all major cleaning by tomorrow once we send of the household gods. and i say "symbolically" cos, like it or not, with a dog in the house, the whole place will be dirty like crazy if i were to stop cleaning the house, even for a day! as for me, i have also gone further to clean off all my facebook posts. 

heh heh...

so, in view of 立春, here's my wish for one and all...

祝各位新春快乐，身体安康，心想事成!

kitchen god pic from http://www.cultural-china.com

kueh bakul pic from http://www.audreycooks.com

upset sister

my 2nd sister came over last evening and from what she described after the visit, i could only conclude she was very angry and upset with my mum. haha! 

you see, for the longest time, she has been telling me that i should be patient la la la... and recently my mum kept calling her to tell her that i always go out with 2 women who were out to harm her. and of cos, she played along and told her that the 2 women had died. but mum continued. and whenever she told her about these 2 women, sis would call me and clarify. of cos, all these were pure nonsense and a result of her paranoia, delusion and dementia.

and yesterday, as i had planned to head out for a drink, i asked her to come over to keep mum company. and that was what she did. i left not too long after she arrived and she chatted with mum. after i left, i smsed her to check if mum needed food. mum had complained that the chicken rice i bought for her was too little and i was hoping that she would pack something for mum. afterall, it would not be nice for mum to go to bed with an empty stomach. and so, she checked with mum and after a while, mum told her she threw away the chicken rice i bought (as i had suspected but thought i should not ask). and this was despite the fact that it was she herself who had asked me to buy chicken rice. she added that when i went out to buy dinner, 2 woman went along and had put in some poison into the rice. her remarks totally threw my sister off. 

she chided mum for all the nonsense and tensions she created for me and about all the nonsensical stuff she had been imagining and spewing. and she tried to rationalize with mum that if i really wanted to poison her, there was really no need to use the chicken rice. instead, there were so many possible avenues for me to do so and that i would have done so if i wanted to. and to top it off, she told mum that if she really had a problem staying with me, she should just move out of my place and don't bother me with all the nonsense. wahhh... and so, in the end, it was me telling her to just relax and let mum be. if she refuses to eat, she will only suffer her own action, there is really nothing that we can do. after all, she is a sick person and as long as we have tried our best, we should just let her be.

i think all my siblings (or at least my 2nd sis and bro) are getting irritated with her behavior. and from what i see, my only conclusion is that their patience are running thin. just last week, my brother chided her for giving me all the problems and her refusal to take food, medication, etc... and his chiding caught me off-guard.

hmmm...

picture from http://www.foodrepublic.com/2012/07/16/lunch-singapore-chicken-rice

没家教!

i was at marine parade this afternoon and saw a gay couple. well, it was very obvious it was a gay couple and clearly, they had just done some shopping for their home. one of them was carrying a broom and mop and some other stuff in a plastic bag.

i walked towards the kueh kueh store and they walked pass me. and interestingly, both went into the kueh kueh store too. since they went in before me, they made their order first. and aiyoh, i was so horrified to see how they placed the order. one went to the cashier to prepare to pay while the other (the one carrying the broom and mop) made the order. and guess what - he used the broom to point to the kueh he wanted. such terrible uncouth behavior!

this was so terribly rude! how could anyone possibly do this? his mother probably never teach him not to point with broomsticks or mops, even if they are new!

没家教！

sighs!

long & short of ahems

was making a comment in tuls blog and was reminded of this question about the long and short of men. ever wonder why some urinals in the male toilets are positioned lower than the rest? and that the majority are positioned about the same height? 

well, the answer is simple. the normal height ones are for normal people. the ones positioned lower are for people who are superbly short or superbly long...

no?

lol!

picture from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Kohler_urinals_Island_Lake_Recreational_Area_Green_Oak_Township_Michigan.JPG