ever see a litted candlelight dancing when the candle is about to end? with each second, you can see the light softening. and often, you see it flickers when there is a small air turbulence around it. and once a while, you get a little anxious when a rush of air blows pass for, at that very moment, it felt as though the light would be extinguished once and for all.
well, that is exactly how i feel currently with regards my mum's health. for her age, she could be considered to be relatively healthy. but in recent days, her health has been failing. she was admitted into the hospital twice recently. and everytime after she returned from hospital, she seemed slightly weaker than before the hospital stay, despite having been told she had recovered. and it was not just the mobility issues, but also her increasing inability deliver a sentence clearly and properly, and her increasing inability to fulfill normal life functions. slowly but surely, her voice has gotten coarser. also, the frequency of her peeing in her sarong had also increased. once a while, when she was too weak to walk to the toilet in time, she would even shit in her sarong. not too sure how she did it, but she had managed to keep her face straight whenever it happened and just accept that it happened. and the domestic help would just go about cleaning her up without a fuss.
to some, seeing his parent getting into such a state can be quite distressing. but to me, i guessed i have come to terms with it. apart from having seen and managed my dad in his final years, i am also able to better accept this as a part of a person's aging journey. it is a journey that all of us have to go through. for now, i only have one thing in my mind. and that is, i would really like my mum to be happy and not worry about anything and for her to walk this final phase of her journey well.
well, that is exactly how i feel currently with regards my mum's health. for her age, she could be considered to be relatively healthy. but in recent days, her health has been failing. she was admitted into the hospital twice recently. and everytime after she returned from hospital, she seemed slightly weaker than before the hospital stay, despite having been told she had recovered. and it was not just the mobility issues, but also her increasing inability deliver a sentence clearly and properly, and her increasing inability to fulfill normal life functions. slowly but surely, her voice has gotten coarser. also, the frequency of her peeing in her sarong had also increased. once a while, when she was too weak to walk to the toilet in time, she would even shit in her sarong. not too sure how she did it, but she had managed to keep her face straight whenever it happened and just accept that it happened. and the domestic help would just go about cleaning her up without a fuss.
to some, seeing his parent getting into such a state can be quite distressing. but to me, i guessed i have come to terms with it. apart from having seen and managed my dad in his final years, i am also able to better accept this as a part of a person's aging journey. it is a journey that all of us have to go through. for now, i only have one thing in my mind. and that is, i would really like my mum to be happy and not worry about anything and for her to walk this final phase of her journey well.
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