late dad's birthday

3 oct was dad's birthday.

i had forgotten about it until my second sis texted me and told me she remembered and was observing a moment's silence. funny. she's the only one amongst all of us who was so totally scarred by dad but she's the only one who remembered. as for me, i have already let him go. of cos, i do remember him and the memories linger but i no longer get reminded of him on such dates. i can see my second sis is still very much trying to prove to herself (and by telling us) that she remembers him. perhaps she still has many misforgivings about him within her that she have not let go.

then again, 3 oct was not his real birthday. my dad's real birthday was some time in nov. we found out after his death cos we consulted the tombstone maker who calculated his real gregorian birthdate from his lunar birthdate, which my mum said was accurate. apparently, my late-dad was smuggled into singapore from china and my grandparents hid him at him until he was 3 years old. they went on to register him with the authorities and gave a fake date of birth.

so... i guess this reinforce my strong believe that concepts such as dates, time, etc are very much human construct to create a point of reference. there is really no meaning to it and that the meaning is created and a value placed on it by us. and through this, we get attached to it. and in all reality, this attachment created the suffering that we all feeling. but when we think about it properly, the date itself is empty. 

buddhist teaching apply here as well...

:-)