of time & money

what do you do when you need time for yourself, need to go for medical appointments, need to run some errants, need to head out for a quick dinner with friends... and in the interest of mum's safety, need to seek other's help to look after your mum? you ask your siblings... simple straight forward logic right? well... that is a theoretical answer.

for me, the truth and hard fact is (1) my brother lives too far away and has his own children to take care of (which i think he is increasingly getting impatient cos his kids are entering the age where getting on his nerves when they fall sick is quite the norm), (2) my eldest sister refuses to talk to me and has stopped coming to my place since 4-over years ago, and (3) my second sis constantly tells me she needs to work, and that she can not spare any time to accompany or to visit mum. and to top if off, she is pressurizing me to get a maid... she'll contribute a part of the cost she says, just don't disturb her work time. funny how everyone seemed to think they can push the responsibility of looking after our mother becos of all sorts of self-centric/ personal commitments. and i am increasingly getting impatient with responses that tries to turn the pressure on me instead. get a maid. get a part time maid. we'll all chip in. but you ask the rest of pay their share... suggestions came fast and easy. but no one wants to do it. and the constant theme behind is, don't get me into this whole business of looking after mum, money can solve the problem... 

sighs... 

ok, never mind, help out financially any amount you want. i will settle everything else. no need to come, just focus on your own and your family issues. for mum, just let me handle. no worries... this has been the rest response to just shut everyone up and stop pressurizing me to spend on maids, etc. and amidst all these, i also seemed to get the impression that they think i can afford it. and just today, one of them told me that my mum and the other siblings believe that i am filthy rich and they must do all they can to stop bee from attempting to drain me of my wealth... sighs... i cannot and will not stop them from believing what they believe in. everything i try to explain is deemed a lie, that i am trying to lie my way out of my "responsibilities". they do not know that for the last 2 over decades, i have been one of the key provider of income for my parents and in recent years, i have been shouldering mum's medical expenses almost entirely alone, to the point that i have hardly save and as of now, have less than a couple of hundreds in my bank account. and if i had not been successful in getting this job, i would probably have to resort to borrowing monies from people. and i can so totally understand what the papers say when they mentioned that current generation are using all their monies to cater to looking after their parents, so much so that they risk ending with no savings for themselves... what shit! 

ok, am venting...

and despite highlighting the need for assistance repeatedly, their responses has also been the same. or rather, sounding more irritated as time passes by. getting quite sick and tired of all these responses from my siblings...