my funeral (updated)

i think i better give an update as to how i want my funeral to be done. i realized i have not updated it since my last post on the same subject. and no, i am not pantang (superstitious) and do not think it is taboo to talk about such subjects, even if it involves me. it is the responsible thing to do. well, here goes... well, here goes...

yes, it will be a buddhist funeral. a simple coffin, cremation followed by sea burial, no frills. coffin for hygiene reasons, cremation and sea burial so that there will not be any future physical remnants of me to remind people about. i'd rather be remembered for my contributions to people's lives, good or bad. and if it was bad, i do seek forgiveness and give assurances that there was never any ill-intentions.

as for everything else, it is secondary. afterall, as a buddhist who does not place too much attachments to things around me, i believe i will die contented (see me remarks below too). i come with nothing and go with nothing.

then again, i shall write these here so that there would be no ambiguity as to how things should be done. i cannot assume people around me has the same ideas of doing things and that if i do not make it explicit, i risk having my loved ones disagreeing on things. nope. this should not happen. not over my dead body (no pun intended here!) heh heh... ok, back to my point. post-death rituals are done to provide the living with a closure, not for the dead. afterall, when i am dead, what more do i need? my body was nothing but a shell where my consciousness once resided. yup. so as a practising buddhist and that everyone around me know i was a buddhist when i was alive, my wake and funeral would be along the same practises as what everyone would expect a buddhist funeral to be like. vegetarian offerings, nightly prayers, donning my buddhist robes that i wore when i took my refuge, simple 3 or 5-day wake (whichever is more convenient). there should be no taoist paraphernalia, this means no joss papers, no paper dolls, no paper houses, no white candles, not green joss sticks etc.

simple, sweet and straight forward.

:-)

ps: previously, i wanted the song "tender" by blur to be played during my wake. it was a song that i held dear as it connected me to a significant period in my past. but i do not think it is necessary to be played during my wake/ funeral now, not that it is any less important, it is just that i am convinced i need not be held hostage to my past by it. so, no need to be attached to such songs anymore. afterall, how can i go peacefully if i continue to be attached to songs of my past...