dreams...

i've been having very disturbed sleep these couple of weeks... and on several nights, there were lotsa dreams, most of which i couldn't recall once i woke up. but there were a few that was very vivid. these were:

• last week, in one of my dreams, mum appeared. i didn't see her, but i felt her presence. and weirdly in the dream, i was alone. and then i saw a baby. it looked like my niece for a moment, and the next moment, i seemed like the baby was a nephew. whatever the case, i picked the baby up (when it was my nephew), and then i realised it had a vagina instead of a penis. and i reached out and pressed my hands onto the vagina, convinced that it was a boy (nephew) instead of a girl. next thing i knew, it morphed into a penis - an adult penis, for that matter. the whole dream was weird. i woke up after that...

• in the second dream that occurred earlier this week (2 dec), my dad appeared and reminded me that it was my mum's birthday and that i must (he insisted, i must) celebrate for her. again, mum was in the dream, not physically but i could sense her presence. and it seemed she was smiling, quietly. i guessed this dream was a case of my subconscious playing up, given the fact that i had planned with mum previously to have a nice quiet dinner with her on her birthday. but during the wake, the funeral co-ordinator told us that there was no need to celebrate her gregorian calendar birthday (2 dec) but her lunar birthday instead (that would fall on 15 dec).

• in one more dream, i could only recall the fact that mum was in the dream. she was smiling at me. other than that, i couldn't recall anything at all about this dream.

• last night, i had a weird dream. in my dream, i seemed to be on a holiday and i was floating in midair and looking at wave-beaten cliffs. it looked like a scene from 12 apostles (Australia) are, only that in the dream, it wasn't. as my view panned out of the cliff, i saw golden shiny stupas and thai-style palaces. it looked like a scene from thailand except that i cannot identify where in thailand that place was. and in the mids of all the stupas and palaces, i saw bee and a group of his friends enjoying themselves there. i was looking at them merry making from up in the sky and was totally divorced from them. it was a very depressing scene.

i really do not know how to interpret some of these dreams. then again, i didn't try.