time and again i have to remind myself not to compare and not to feel that i have been taken for granted by people around me. it is the same with all my friends. and it is increasingly difficult not to feel so.
i am saying this becos (1) everytime, it seemed like i have to initiate the gathering and do the calling, or (2) everytime, when someone remembers something or wants to have a gathering, they will call me and ask me to organise, (3) and even after making all the arrangements, i often get people backing out like as though it is a chore to meet up (4) and even after making all the co-ordinations, i always get people telling me at the very last minute their schedule change, they have work to do and will be late, etc etc etc it is very difficult to get things going when people see things from their own self-centric angles or fail to give priority to the gathering, (5) and on rare occasions when someone volunteers to do the organisation, they will start by saying, ok, let's meet here and this time, can? and when i say can, they will then say, ok, on, can you help to call the rest cos i am busy, cos i am la la la... hmmm... and the latest is that people now are making me feel that "now you not working, you have time to do the organising." it had happened and happened and happened. and it comes to a time when people now take it as a norm that i will be the one to remember things, to organise things and to get things going. it is very tiring. and often, so very often, you just hope someone will take the initiative and do the planning and co-ordination and you can just attend and be merry.
so increasingly, i find it very hard to convince myself that i am not being taken for granted. sighs, why am i now ranting? or am i just tired and stressed up before the lunar new year?
i am saying this becos (1) everytime, it seemed like i have to initiate the gathering and do the calling, or (2) everytime, when someone remembers something or wants to have a gathering, they will call me and ask me to organise, (3) and even after making all the arrangements, i often get people backing out like as though it is a chore to meet up (4) and even after making all the co-ordinations, i always get people telling me at the very last minute their schedule change, they have work to do and will be late, etc etc etc it is very difficult to get things going when people see things from their own self-centric angles or fail to give priority to the gathering, (5) and on rare occasions when someone volunteers to do the organisation, they will start by saying, ok, let's meet here and this time, can? and when i say can, they will then say, ok, on, can you help to call the rest cos i am busy, cos i am la la la... hmmm... and the latest is that people now are making me feel that "now you not working, you have time to do the organising." it had happened and happened and happened. and it comes to a time when people now take it as a norm that i will be the one to remember things, to organise things and to get things going. it is very tiring. and often, so very often, you just hope someone will take the initiative and do the planning and co-ordination and you can just attend and be merry.
so increasingly, i find it very hard to convince myself that i am not being taken for granted. sighs, why am i now ranting? or am i just tired and stressed up before the lunar new year?
2 comments:
while on the plane, F suggested to me that maybe i shd ask u (YES! YOU!) to organize a class gathering for 20th anniversary of graduation.
Er.... u didn't really read this, OK?
damned it! i knew this was coming! hahahahaha!...
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