Letting go

I opened my safe today and found a long forgotten envelope. It looked old, worn, and I cannot recall its content until I opened it. There was a notepad, a stack of photos, cards, and even negatives (films). 

These were items from my early relationships to which I held dear. There were a few cards written to me by James. They captured his thoughts, how contented he felt when I held him in my arms, etc. James was probably his best when he put things in writing. And there were also two by Su How. He was not as expressive as James and his cards were just that - cards with a simple sign off. The cards and the content were reflective of the persons behind them - one reflective, articulate and well-read, while the other, simple and unassuming. 

The photos, negatives and the notebook were from the days when Amos and I dated. Those were the early days before I "settled down". Emotions were highly intense and interactions very physical. The notebook captured very detailed accounts of how we met, our dates, our intimate moments, etc. Those were the days before blogging and I wanted to capture our special moments. People would probably think it was written by porn author if they did not know the context. Heh…

I tore up the items and threw them all away. No one will need these items when I eventually go. Leave these as part of my memory. That is enough. And if they should fade, so be it.

Time to let go.